Paula died just over a year ago.

One of the ways I'm dealing with that loss is by raising money for our local MS Walk. Money raised through the walk will be used in the fight against multiple sclerosis. By getting pledges and donations, I'm helping to defeat the disease that killed Paula.

We have a rather ambitious goal for our 2005 "Almighty Alrightys" walk team. Paula would have been 52 this year. We'll raise $100 for each of those 52 years - a total of five thousand, two hundred dollars. And that will bring the MS Society five thousand, two hundred dollars closer to finding a cure for multiple sclerosis.

So how is our small walk team going to come up with over $5,000? Here's what we're hoping for:

Two $500 donations

$1,000

Five $200 donations

$1,000

Ten $125 donations

$1,250

Twenty $50 donations

$1,000

Thirty-four $25 donations

$850

Ten $10 donations

$100

Total

$5,200

The theme for this year's MS Walk is "This is Why We Walk," and many of our local MS Walk volunteers will be wearing buttons that say "Ask Me Why!"

It sounds kind of strange, but looking back, our family found Paula's multiple sclerosis to be manageable. We coped with the changes as Paula's condition slowly deteriorated. For a decade and a half, we helped Paula fight the disease and live her life as fully as possible.

What isn't always manageable is the sense of loss and the feeling of devastation. At age 51, Paula and I would have celebrated our 30th wedding anniversary.

But Paula died before she reached 51.

Many folks live to be 70 or 80 years old. We should have had at least 30 more years together.

But she's gone.

She wasn't there last Christmas, which would have been somewhere around our 36th Christmas together.

She wasn't there for Brian's wedding. Nor for Sarah's.

She didn't see Chris and Carrie's first home, and wasn't there as Katie, Carrie and Sarah graduated from college. She won't be there David and Brian graduate from college.

And she won't be there for our grandchildren and great-grandchildren.

Why am I involved with the MS Walk?

It is pretty simple, really. Our family suffered a devastating loss when Paula died, and we continue to feel that loss every day. I'm involved with the MS Walk because I don't want any more families to suffer that same kind of loss. Not my family. Not my neighbor's family. And not your family.

If you'd like to help us fight the disease that killed Paula, please consider donating to Paula's MS Walk team, The Almighty Alrightys.

Rob