Based on my notes and what I remember from the service, this is pretty doggone close to my opening remarks from the Memorial Service held for Paula on Saturday, February 22, 2003:

It is raining and overcast outside today. Some folks would say that the weather is perfect for a memorial service. Actually, since this memorial service is about Paula, we should have bright sunshine, there should be a gentle breeze, and we should be in a big field full of daisies and lilacs. Oh... and in the background we should here the Cowsills singing "I love the flower girl."

There's an old African adage that most of us have heard. It says something like "It takes a village to raise a child." I've always felt that implies sort of a one way street, with the entire focus on how the people in the village affect the child. But it isn't a one-way street - that child in the village affects the people who are caring and nurturing her.

If you take a look around the room, you'll see a small part of Paula's village - people that had an impact her life and were in turn affected by her. Some of the people in Paula's village never met her in person - their connection to her was through other members of Paula's family. Others haven't seen her in years - some since Paula and I were in school.

Regardless of how you became a part of "Paula's Village," how often you saw her, or how long it has been since you last saw Paula, everyone in this room has had some sort of positive impact on Paula and our immediate family - either going from you to Paula to the family, or going from you to the family to Paula.

Each and everyone of you in this room has had some sort of an impact on our family. In one way or another, you've helped us become the people we are, and helped us fulfill our commitment to take care of Paula. It is awfully doggone inadequate, but please accept my thanks for your love, care, concern, and the part you played in "Paula's Village."

I first met Paula when we were both in 5th grade. We went to different elementary schools in Whitehall, but were both in the band. She played the flute and I played the saxophone. She sat almost directly in front of me. My recollection is a bit fuzzy, but I'm pretty sure we meet when she keep bouncing the back of her head against my index finger. Some folks may suggest that Paula wouldn't have been bouncing the back of her head against my finger if I hadn't been leaning waaaay forward with my arm fully extended, but I don't care to remember it that way.

During middle school and high school, we were in the same group of "band friends." We did a lot of group activities together, and dated twice in high school - once to a movie and the second time... Well, here's how that came about:

It must have been May of 1971, close to the school year. It was about three weeks before the senior prom, and it dawned on me that since I'd never have another chance to go to my senior prom, I probably should go. Not wanting to go alone (and not wanting to go with Mike, Preston, Rodney or Ken), I decided to ask a girl in our class to go with me.

I thought of all people I knew, and decided that if I was going to go to the prom, the one person I'd want to go with as Paula.

So one morning, while waiting for our government class to start, I leaned forward and asked her if she thought it was too late for me to ask a girl to go to the prom with me. She said something about it depending on who the girl was. As you saw if you watched the video last night, Paula agreed to go to the prom with me.

Then Paula went off to college in Huntington, WV while I stayed home and went to OSU. Sometime during my sophomore year our old high school was putting on a play I wanted to see. A friend told me Paula was in town for the weekend, so I called her and asked her to go.

The rest, as they say, is history - we started dating, Paula moved back to Whitehall, and after a while I got to thinking that sooner or later I was going to get married. And when I asked myself who I'd like to spend the rest of my life with, the answer was pretty much a no brainer - it was Paula.

Spending the rest of my life with Paula is not going to happen now - she's left me, and left a huge hole in all our lives. Paula and I faced some challenges over the years that were a bit different that those faced by most other couples, but through it all she had a great, positive attitude. She woke up every day with that smile on her face. And boy did she try hard. She did anything and everything she could - sometimes more than she should have.

You can count on your two hands the number of times in the last five years she complained, lost her temper, or ranted and raved. About the only thing I ever suggested that riled her up and she wouldn't go along with is was eating food from White Castle.

You know, if you toss a pebble into a pond, the pebble will make a series of ripples that move out and touch water all over the pond. In much the same way, each of our lives send out ripples that touch the people around us, and through them, people we've never even met. As you can see by the number of people here, Paula's life has positively touched a lot of people.

Paula lived a full life - filled with joy, love and happiness. She put up with a lot from me and the kids, and she gave us a lot in return. She's leaving a legacy or love, joy and happiness that will be with our family for generations... and you've helped build that legacy.

If you knew Paula personally, it doesn't matter whether your most recent contact with her was last week, last year, or 30 years ago - a part of you rubbed off on Paula and helped make her the extraordinary woman we knew and loved.

If you haven't met Paula personally, you contributed to the legacy through the love, friendship, care, compassion and support you shared with our family members... and they in turn shared it with Paula.

I hope, that as part of "Paula's Village," you and your family can share in Paula's legacy and focus on the joy, love and happiness Paula brought to all around her.

I want to thank you all for the part you've played in making our family what it is, and also thank you in advance for your continuing love and support - we all appreciate it more than I could ever express.